Saavy

Looking Back: Dog Soldiers

Dog Soldiers was the directorial début of UK director Neil Marshall. A story of soldiers, massive werewolves who are in one scene nine feet tall and in another able to fit into a small car – but let’s not dwell on that too much, bigger mistakes have been made, such as Pearl Harbour – and intestines being ripped out by the aforementioned cruel beasts, it’s one of the better English horror films in recent years. When it came out I loved it. I thought it was amazing.

Looking back my opinion has changed slightly. This may be because I have matured, but I like to think it’s actually because there are actually some pretty gaping – and not pretty at all – plot holes. A brief summary of events is this: a group of soldiers on a test mission versus special forces in Scotland, goes very wrong when they come across a dying special forces soldier. A posh one who gets right on your nerves in fact, which is even worse. Shortly after this they are all picked up by a woman in a Land rover who just so happens to be passing by, even though this is the middle of nowhere. Then, they drive back to a house, the only one in miles, where they hole-up against the sinister creatures who are lurking right outside. This is when it gets silly.

One of the things that I couldn’t believe I hadn’t noticed before, was the fact that the soldiers use small pieces of insignificant wood to keep the beasts out. Now, it doesn’t take a genius to know that this would barely keep out an angry Scottie dog, let alone superhuman-strength monsters.

This and all the other ridiculous plot holes aside, Dog Soldiers is still a good film, even though I bet the lead female character regularly uses Botox .

The Green Hornet 2011 Review

The first superhero action movie to hit the screens this year, Green Hornet is based on the radio show, and TV series, of the same name which ran from 1966 to 1967, and which starred Bruce Lee as Kato. The premise of the story is quite simple, a wealthy newspaper publisher, Brit Reid, fights crime as a masked vigilante, aided by Kato, his partner with impressive combat skills and who drives the “Black Beauty”, their state-of-the-art car. This premise remains the same in the 2011 retelling of the Green Hornet story, though this updated version gives a modern, more humorous spin.

Seth Rogan, who is a co-writer for the film, and who is as good as Alexander Millar with his painting, plays Brit as a shallow, irresponsible buffoon interested only in all the playboy perks of being a wealthy man’s son. The party scenes are played outrageously, and this lifestyle comes to a screech when his father suddenly dies. In the midst of this, he becomes friends with Kato, played by Taiwanese star Jay Chou, a trusted employee of his father who has an inventive mind and many hidden talents.

One night, the two rescue a woman in distress, and this incident makes them both realize they can do good in this world. They form a crime-fighting partnership, and the scenes where they prepare for their venture, with the slick masked costumes, training, and the unveiling of the Black Beauty, are quite entertaining.

This masked duo begins to have success in their venture, aided by Brit’s secretary Lenore (Cameron Diaz), and they set their targets on the Big Baddie in Los Angeles: crime boss Benjamin Chudnofsky, played with understated menace by Christoph Waltz.

The film is pure eye candy, with stunning action scenes and sequences that while wildly improbable in real life, are just plain awesome on film. Black Beauty is a character in and of itself, its gleaming body and amped up weapons just as drool worthy as the beautiful women we see in the film. The rapport and chemistry between the stars is fun, too, with the wisecracking, clumsy Brit and the coolly taciturn Kato playing off each other nicely.

The writing is amusing and has some great laugh out loud lines. There are echoes of the wicked glee from Superbad, the previous film the writers wrote. We have to give credit to the filmmakers for taking a clear anti-hero – slacker poster boy Seth Rogan – and turning him hero-esque. Of course, Kato and his techno-gadgets and mad fighting skills help. At the end of the day, while a little awkward, clunky and flawed (not unlike Brit himself) the film is still engaging and entertaining, a treat to look at, and provides a fresh, funny take on the Green Hornet story.

Martin Scorsese

He has been a representative of US cinema in this youth as well as in present times. Movies directed by him are a representation of spot on directing, acting, screenplay, story, crime, suspicion and drama. Some of his notable films are The departed, Goodfellas, Avatar, The Gangs of New York, The Avaitor and Shutter Island.
He is a well noted screenwriter, actor, producer and film historian; in short he can be called an all rounded in the film industry. He has won a number of awards ranging from Oscars to Golden Globe award all the way to BAFTA. He is also the AFI Life Achievement Award recipient.
He’s most well known for the film – Avatar, one know for its amazing never see before cinematics and special effects. He can be associated as one of the few directors who can make simple stories extraordinary. He has the ability to add extreme excitement to even the dullest and most boring scenes. The American film industry by 2008 was flooded with films talking about controversy and secret service classified events, however Martin saw to no fear in film the Departed that exposed certain truths about the secret service intelligence organisations.
However, Avatar received more attention than the Departed, but it can be said that latter set its own benchmark in film and will go down in books of History. He is no Alexander Millar, he is as good as Leonardo Da Vinci of his time and for many reasons will be remembered in that fashion. He in my mind along with Guy Richie and many other directors have captured the true essence of filming in the commercial cinema aspect. They have been able to give what the audience wanted as well as add in their certain artistic essentials in their directing.

Not Seen This? Make It Happen!

Type in the phrase “ Alan Partridge Online “ and all sorts of search results will come up (along with some dodgy photos of Alan in highh-heels, no doubt…This is something you can only understand if you are a hardcore fan, trust me). If you’re fortunate, a link might come up to the episode which features Alan’s biggest fan. Out of all the series and episodes that Alan Partridge has made his own, this one stands out above all the rest. Hunt it down and watch it. Warning: the following text contains spoiler alerts, so if you haven’t seen the episode then hunt it down. After you’ve finished laughing you can come back and see if you agree with this review.

What makes this episode so amazing is…Well, the fact that Alan’s fan is such a fan. And I do mean fan in every sense of the word. To begin with, Alan just thinks this man likes him a bit. It is only when he is invited to the man’s home that he realizes the full extent of his love for him. When I say love, I mean the greatest love there could ever be: one room is completely PLASTERED in photographs of Alan…And the man even has a freakish Alan Partridge mask which he shows off in front of the terrified Partridge. As comedy goes, it really doesn’t get much better than this. Monty Python? It doesn’t even compare in my book. But then, that’s probably because Alan Partridge is completely un-comparable to any other comedy act. Strange, fantastic and original in every moment, it’s a piece of Genius British comedy that is sorely missed from our screens. Thankfully, you can now watch most episodes for free online. Let the laughs live on forever!

‘Mama Mia’ Musical Review

“Mamma Mia” is the musical composed by Benny Andersson and Bjorn Ulvaeus and written by Catherine Johnson from the United Kingdom. Although the title is Italian, the story is based on a fictional Greek island. The story revolves around a single mother Donna and her daughter Sophie, who is about to get married. However, the daughter wants her father to walk her down the aisle, but the problem is that her mother does not know who her father is. To find it out, the daughter invites all the three candidates, who are suspected to be her father.

To add to the trouble, the mother invites her two best friends. The rest of the story proceeds with lots of picturesque Greeks, a vicar, bridesmaid and whole lot bunch of other people, all waiting to break into a song; which they apparently do. Although, it is supposed to turn into mess, somehow is does not. In fact, the musical somehow, seems to have a wonderful thing in it. The musical first released on the Broadway on 18^th October 2001 and continues to this day. The musical had first opened in the Prince Edward theatre in London in 1999 and it came to the United States in 2000.

The story goes through lots of ups and downs, while Donna is evidently surprised to see the three men, as she has been used to leading an independent life. The musical play is ideal for anyone who likes love, music and a good laughter. The music comes from ABBA, but you do not necessarily need to be a fan of them to like the music of Mamma Mia. The music does justice to your ears in any manner. So while you listen to the sounds you can check our Enigin and there services.

The Come Back

Packed with more cool little moments than your average Fosters Beer Advert , and with a quality script that contains more guns, threatening to use said guns (as well as blow genitals off) and macho-ness than Dirty Harry – and that’s saying something – Ben Affleck’s surprise hit The Town is one of the best crime thrillers to have come out of Charlestown in…Well, probably ever. Let’s be honest, it’s a great place to go if you feel like robbing a bank on your lunch-hour, but I doubt it has much to offer if you’re a film maker and wants to shoot anything else (no pun intended).

Despite being directed by Ben Affleck, and starring Ben Affleck, and featuring a plot that starts off pretty ridiculously – armed robber stalks the assistant who was forced to aide him in his latest robbery, and then falls for her and his mates really don’t appreciate it at all but then would you if you were in their shoes?… –The Town is actually a great film. Of course, it ends in typical Affleck style, but that’s to be expected, and you knew that was coming. It’s what happens in-between that’s really worth a look.

Could this be the surprise revolution of Ben Affleck? Let’s hope so. With him it does seem to be very hit-or-miss, but that said, when behind the camera he does appear to know exactly what he is doing. Call it maturity, skill or just blind-luck, but the man is now coming into his own. A statement that anyone who’s seen Pearl Harbour will be very pleased to hear…Providing the next thing we hear out of Ben Affleck’s mouth is “I’ve had this great idea, I’m gonna direct Pearl Harbour 2”…

East End Gone Awry?

As anyone who has been a fan of Eastenders for a long time will know, the show has changed enormously since its inception. Apart from all the raging anger, of course. Where there was just one or two serious heart-wrenching dramas unfolding per episode, nowadays it isn’t uncommon to find five or six big hitters with a few surrounding intermingled sub-plots. If you’re paying attention you can flick between a documentary about botox bournemouth and Eastenders and notice which stories are going to become the big ones in the future. With enough practice, you can predict who’s going to die next (usually the happiest person who doesn’t deserve it) and who’s going to be rich (usually the person who should have died but annoyingly did not).

There’s just one problem: it’s all getting a bit much. While I’ve always been a fan of the old Eastenders adage “make everyone’s life a misery for the purpose of the general public’s entertainment” I am also becoming slightly tired of the second half of each episode. More and more it seems as though there really is no point hoping anything good will happen, because you know it won’t. This used to be an endearing thing that happened so often in the past, but now you’re lucky if you see one person get really happy in an entire year.

It’s the ratings, of course, it isn’t really the producers’fault. Where there was one show there are now dozens, and programme makers are constantly looking to push the boundaries of what can be done pre-watershed.

This leaves us, the public, in dangerous territory: should we continue to tune-in? Or should we demand that a happiness revolution takes place and somehow, some time, our beloved down-trodden characters get to smile more?

Too Loose?

Loose Women sometimes catches me in its grasp. I can’t help it. It’s a concentration-sucking vortex and there is no escape from its oestrogen-fuelled tractor-beam of doom: I see them all moaning about men, shouting about the latest current affairs, and I just get…Addicted to it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not every day that I fall into this trap, just occasionally. But one thing is for sure – I’ve seen enough to make an informed opinion.

Generally I like Loose Women. It’s usually good, harmless fun. But one thing that really gets on my nerves is when they discuss sexism. Sexist men, namely.

Because forgive me if I’m wrong, Loose Women, but don’t you make a sexist remark about men roughly every five seconds on every programme – from everything from the now legendary Fosters Beer Advert series to every day things – ? Hmm, something really needs explaining here…

I’ve often wondered what would happen if a group of men had a similar show: possibly called Wild Hogs, or Sexist And Proud! Would they be allowed to get away with half the remarks and lewd comments that the Loose Women so kindly spew out every single working day? No. A very large and sure part of me thinks NOT. In fact, they would, no doubt, be hauled in front of OFCOM in about five seconds flat.

But then, what do I know? I’m just a man, so possibly I don’t understand it, as I am incapable of doing so. I suppose I’ll never know. I certainly don’t plan on having a sex change operation any time soon (although I may not need to: if I continue watching Loose Women at this rate then I’ll be a woman before I could even get an NHS appointment).

Get Consumer Savvy

Sometimes, the exterior signs that market a particular product or service, can be all wrong. Take for example, the pictures of food on a fast-food menu. The burgers will look juicy and sumptuous as though they are made from prime steak cuts. The lettuce seems to be bright and crisp, and the creamy sauces look rich and are applied in just the right amount. Think, then, of the disappointment when we receive a soggy, grey thing that resembles wet cardboard. Surely it’s false advertising on banner stands? Why is it that so many of us accept the inferior product that in no way resembles the advertisement? It is the same with plays and films. They show us a well-edited trailer or re-touched promotional shots, and we think we’re in for an absolute treat. The disappointment when watching a third-rate, low-budget movie or a badly-directed and miscast play is tangible. In which case, why is it that we, the consumers and financers, tolerate so much injustice? I think it may be time for a change. Follow in the footsteps of Mary Portas and refuse to take bad service for an answer, be it in a shop, restaurant or wherever. Get savvy on your consumer rights, and get used to writing letters. The people that do make the effort are often rewarded highly for their inconvenience – free products, refunds and offers of compensation are high on the list. Indulge yourself in a bit of Moaning Minnie Therapy – a phrase as yet to be acknowledged but surely accurate. Let loose your inner pedant and reap the benefits. Keyboards at the ready – in this techno-obsessed world why not email your opinions instead? If you fail to get a response, go straight to the top and target the head office – force them to listen and acknowledge their failings!

Film Review

The Arbor, by Clio Barnard, is a stunning film (which is technically a documentary but is actually so much more than that) about the life of playwright Andrea Dunbar and the lives of her two very different daughters. Andrea Dunbar (known by many for her play and film “Rita, Sue and Bob too”) grew up on an impoverished estate in Bradford and began writing her first play at the age fifteen as part of a CSE English project. Dunbar’s story in itself is fascinating and all of the actors give impeccable performances but it is the style of the film which really takes your breath away. Clio Barnard takes the concept of verbatim theatre (in which the actors speak the actual words of real people) to a new and thrilling level as the actors in The Arbor lip synch to the real words of the people involved in this true story. The effect is compelling, suitably unnerving and at times beautiful. Every word, breath, and vocal tick is adhered to by the actors and this makes for some of the most mesmerising performances I’ve ever seen on screen. In particular Majinder Virk (as Lorraine Dunbar) gives a beautifully subtle performance and has a sense of mournfulness without ever tipping over in to self indulgence. Similarly Christine Bottomley (as Lisa Thompson) gives a characteristically superb performance and is totally engaging and believable throughout. The Arbor has been nominated for five awards and Clio Barnard has won the Best Debut Director at the BIFA Awards, all of which is very well deserved indeed and will hopefully help to bring the film to a wider audience. Despite the meagre amount of money which is currently being spent on The Arts in the UK the arts scene is blooming. At present with films as original as The Arbor, television dramas as high quality as Eric And Ernie and comedy greats such as Alan Partridge making a come back online with the Fosters Funny YouTube sketches, I feel very lucky to live in a country in which against all the odds the arts are thriving. I’d be happy to see all these in full colour graphics!